Monday, February 4, 2013

Negative Happiness



Negative Happiness
Charlie Earl

Many people assume that happiness is a shining moment of momentary joy or the acquisition of some item or state of mind. My sense is that happiness, or perhaps more precisely… contentment, can be achieved through not having something. For example I do not have a sexually transmitted disease (STD). That makes me happy. I do not have to scratch in the dirt on a daily basis finding worms for dinner. That makes me happy. Writing an occasional column that does not generate wrath and furor…. sometimes makes me happy. Managing to survive in Northwest Ohio until the end of January without plowing snow from my driveway makes me darned near ecstatic. Bottom line is that happiness doesn’t always involve a trip to Disneyland. It can be a quiet afternoon at home with no interruptions.

Happiness or its pursuit is highly contextual and personal. For those of us who cherish liberty happiness can be defined simply as having the government and its assortment of do-gooders just leaving us alone. Solitude and reflection are not typical notions of happiness, but for some of us they are illusive and coveted. For example, I prefer to watch meaningful events alone. Ohio State versus Michigan football games, the Super Bowl, election debates and election returns are the types of activities that I enjoy absorbing without continuous input and chatter from others. So, based on my own personal preferences, I can conclude that happiness can be the avoidance of annoyance. That could explain why politicians generally cause me to be unhappy.

Happiness as a dramatic event or special occasion is radically overrated. How many long-anticipated family vacations turn out as giddily enchanting as the expectations? How many glamorous brides have shed tears over some minor mishap during what should be one of the most glorious days of her life? No…happiness is rarely accompanied by rolling drums and trumpets blaring. It is more often similar to the soothing sounds of a harp or a gentle violin solo. Happiness is more often co-joined with contentment than with adrenaline. The pursuit of happiness should a solid journey toward self fulfillment rather than a frantic scramble for fleeting fun. Happiness is not hedonistic grasping but more like sweetly savoring moments of achievement and peace.

For many, happiness is equated with escapism. Through drugs, alcohol or any number of personality-altering enhancements, some folks seem driven to look for happiness beyond their daily realities. They haven’t yet accepted the fact that after the escapist journey has ended….reality remains. The pathway towards fulfillment, contentment and happiness is similar to playing one’s way around a Monopoly board. Each little step, every new property leads one toward victory. A player cannot conquer the board with one move because it requires a series of well-executed maneuvers to reach the final goal. There may be setbacks or losses, but the player can never claim victory while sitting idle or withdrawing. The game must be played one step at a time.

Obviously the pursuit of true happiness is more than just a game, but the applications and lessons learned are similar. The board defines the parameters of the pursuit, and it is often wiser to seek happiness in little ways in tiny increments rather than to jump off the board. The disciplined life is a proven path to happiness if it does not become an obsessive quest. Happiness does not have to be a pedal-to-the-metal pursuit. It can be one’s reward for doing the little things well. Enjoy the game, and may your properties be loaded with hotels.

Charlie Earl
  

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